


well, say something.

by alto (themorninglark)



Category: Free!
Genre: Free! Eternal Summer Episode 11, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-12
Updated: 2014-09-12
Packaged: 2018-02-17 02:57:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2294327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themorninglark/pseuds/alto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Well, say something."</p><p>or, five times Makoto tried to say something to Haru during the week, and one time he finally listened, when the fireworks went off.</p>
            </blockquote>





	well, say something.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my Episode 11 reaction fic. It is my attempt to tease out the little nuances of the episode, to show the strength of their relationship and what this confrontation scene means for Makoto and Haru. The process of writing it was cathartic for me, so I hope it's a good read for you, too. Thank you for sharing in the love that is MakoHaru. Comments and kudos make my day <3
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr: http://themorninglark.tumblr.com/

“Well, say something.”

Haru’s breathing deeply. His voice drops a little lower, and he’s paused, suspended in that moment, after his outburst. Any time now, Makoto knows, the fireworks will go off in the sky behind them, and whatever he says next will be punctuated with bright lights, like a confession.

He finally lets go of Haru’s wrist.

_Oh, Haru. I’ve been saying something to you all week. Haven’t you been listening?_

 

**5.**

It’s after practice, and they’re all flopping on the bench like dead fish after a particularly gruelling training session from Coach Sasabe. But Makoto knows they needed it, and he reminds the team of this.

“We should bring something over to Iwatobi SC Returns to thank him,” says Gou.

Out of the corner of his eye, Makoto catches a small movement from Haru. He hears Nagisa in the background vaguely, saying something about Iwatobi cream bread, but he turns and the silent form of Haru shrugging off his towel and standing up is all he sees.

Haru stands still for the most infinitesmal of moments, looking out at the pool impassively.

“Haru? What is it?”

“I’m going to swim a little longer,” says Haru, turning back to glance at Makoto.

Rei starts to say something, but to Makoto’s relief, Nagisa cuts him off with some energetic babble about Haru being fired up.

 _Thank you, Nagisa,_ thinks Makoto.

Haru’s still looking at him. There’s a studied indifference in his expression, but Makoto knows there's the rumblings of a wild, roiling storm behind those blue, blue eyes, and he knows Haru is waiting for his reaction.

He holds his best friend’s gaze calmly, for a second, then softens into a smile. “Got it. We’ll go on ahead, then.”

It’s what Haru needs to hear. He turns back towards the pool without a word and gets on the starting block.

Makoto turns his unwavering smile onto Nagisa and Rei. “Shall we go, then?”

 

**4.**

“So, Tachibana-kun, was there something in particular…”

Makoto’s sitting in the guidance counselling room with Amakata-sensei. He’s looking down at his palms, resting in his lap, fingers twining together a little anxiously. It’s taken him a long time to get here, and he still isn’t totally sure if it’s the right thing, but -

He thinks firmly, for the thousandth time, he’ll never know until he tries. Like swimming. He was scared of the water for such a long time. _Look at me now. Captain of the swimming club. Who knows what else I can do?_

He looks up. “I’d like to go to a university somewhere... somewhere else. I think I might want to try studying to become a teacher. The local university doesn't have such courses.”

To his surprise, Amakata-sensei doesn’t bat an eyelid. She smiles, gently. “I’m glad to hear that, Tachibana-kun.”

“Eh?” Makoto can’t help the small, confused sound that squeaks forth from his throat.

Amakata-sensei’s head is down as she rifles in her drawer. “You have the temperament for it. You can take it from your homeroom teacher and club teacher. Trust me. I’ve seen you look after Nanase-kun, Hazuki-kun and Ryuugazaki-kun for two years now.”

She says all this decisively, barely stopping for breath. Makoto feels a little better.

“Also, hmm… how do I put this?” Amakata-sensei pauses. “You’ve lived in Iwatobi your whole life. You, Nanase-kun, and the others. But there’s a lot more to the world. And it’s good for young people to go out and see what it has to offer. How about Tokyo?”

She puts a stack of leaflets and a form in front of Makoto.

“Tokyo?” Makoto picks up the brochure on the top. He’s not sure what to say. He had thought of it, but it seemed so far away from everything he's ever know. His family. The swimming club. His friends. Haru.

Amakata-sensei nods. “Your grades are good enough, and there are some excellent teaching programmes in the universities there. Here, look at this.” She opens one of the leaflets and starts talking him through the stages of a teaching degree.

Makoto leaves the guidance room half an hour later with what feels like about a hundred different pieces of paper and a head full of nonstop running thoughts about the future. He rounds a corner, and he sees the last person he expects to see, standing by himself, staring into space.

It’s Haru.

One look at Haru’s face, and Makoto knows not to ask what he was doing here on his own. He shelves the thought for now, and fills the silence, as he does, with inconsequential chatter. “It’s been a while since we walked home together,” he says, keeping his voice light. “You’ve been staying after practice to swim on your own lately.”

There’s nothing in it. He’s just stating a fact. He doesn’t expect Haru to explain himself, and Haru knows this too. They fall into that old, familiar step, side by side, feet finding their way home. A slow, gentle warmth starts to bubble up inside Makoto. He’s missed this.

“What were you doing here?” asks Haru, in his blunt way.

“I was…” Makoto starts to say, then drifts off.

It’s too fresh in his mind, that conversation he’s just had in the guidance counselling room. He hasn’t even had time to make a firm decision for himself, let alone figure out what to say to Haru about it. His mind casts back to the last time he took a big plunge into the unknown, signing up for the swimming club in elementary school. Haru was by his side. He would never have done it without him. He’d said as much, on the slide when they were children. _I won’t go without you, Haru-chan._

But years have passed them by, and he can’t always drag Haru around with him anymore.

He realises he’s fallen silent, and Haru is looking at him, impassive as always, but Makoto can read his curiosity in the quirk of his mouth and the slight widening of his eyes. “I was… just talking with Ama-chan-sensei for a bit.” he says, eventually. “So…”

“Oh,” Haru says, cutting him off. He breaks his gaze, and looks ahead.

 _So, I might have come to a decision about what to do after high school._ The words die on Makoto’s lips. He knows when Haru’s had enough of a conversation, and he knows when to let well enough alone.

He casts his gaze downwards, feeling a little guilty at his hesitation. “Mmm,” is all he says.

 

**3.**

They’ve walked on in silence for a bit.

“It’s going to be the Obon Festival soon,” says Makoto, turning to Haru with his usual warm smile.

He knows it’s not that Haru doesn’t want to talk to him. Haru always wants to talk to him. Makoto just needs to find the right words. He’s been mulling over this on their way home, trying to think about how to say what he needs to.

But for now, he’ll settle for easier topics.

“Yeah,” says Haru.

“Are your parents coming home?” He hasn’t seen them in a while. They both haven’t. Haru’s parents are always travelling.

“At the end of summer.”

Makoto laughs. “As free-spirited as always.”

They come up to a bulletin board with some posters on it. “Oh yeah,” says Makoto. “We should all go watch the fireworks together. We’ll invite Nagisa and Rei and everyone too.”

Haru perks up at this. He gives the closest thing to a smile that Makoto has seen from him all week. He hasn’t even seen Haru this relaxed in the water at swimming club practice. “Yes, we should.”

Makoto, watching over his best friend as always, smiles gently at this. _Haru-chan,_ he thinks, _at the end of the day, it doesn’t take much to make you happy, does it?_

As cold as he seems, for Haru, Makoto knows it’s always been friendship above all.

They go on to the stone steps where they usually part ways. “Later,” says Haru, turning.

Something wells up in Makoto. He needs to say this to Haru. He can’t make big decisions like moving to Tokyo without telling Haru first. Maybe it’s okay to say it now, after seeing Haru’s mood lighten a little. “Haru!” he calls out.

Haru pauses, and turns.

“I, uh… I wanted to talk to you about plans for after graduation.”

Haru looks away from him. “I’m done talking about that.”

It had only been for the briefest of seconds, but Makoto had seen it - a curtain come down over Haru’s gaze, the sound of a door shutting. Not a forceful slam, nothing loud, just the quiet, firm click of a lock in a key.

“No, it’s not that!” says Makoto without thinking, reaching out to Haru, his voice raised a little in desperation. “It’s just that - “

It is at that point when Ran and Ren choose the worst time possible to come running out of the house.

Makoto’s barely listening as they clutch on to him and welcome him home. He’s still turning the words over in his mind, looking up at Haru as he starts to mount the stairs, and Ran asks him to have dinner with them. Haru’s expression softens, ever, ever so slightly, and he gives Ran the smallest of smiles as he says, next time.

As Makoto watches Haru’s slight figure recede into the horizon, a sinking feeling settles in his stomach. In another time, Haru would have seen the look on Makoto’s face and heard the rising tone in his voice, would have stopped, and understood, and listened. But Haru’s gone and closed himself off now, and in that moment, Makoto has a foreboding premonition that sooner, rather than later, something’s got to give.

 

**2.**

“I don’t understand you.”

It’s all Haru says to Nagisa, his head down and eyes shaded, before turning and walking up the stairs to the viewing platform.

“Haru-chan…”

Nagisa’s voice behind him is soft, unsure, hesitating.

Makoto watches Haru as he leaves. His resolve hardens. Now that it’s come to this, that Haru’s turned his back on even his closest friends, it’s up to him. _Haru, you have to listen to me now,_ he thinks as he moves to follow.

He feels a hand at his sleeve, and turns to find Nagisa there, looking like he wants to say something, but - for once - at a complete and utter loss for words. His eyes are shimmering with what looks like the start of some serious, heaving sobs.

“Nagisa,” says Makoto, gently. “Don’t cry. If you do, I will too. And then how will I speak to Haru?”

Nagisa takes a deep, gulping breath. “Mako-chan, I’m just… so worried.”

Makoto puts an arm round Nagisa’s shoulder and draws him into a quick hug. “It’ll be ok. Leave it to me,” he says.

And the strangest thing is, as he says that, he knows it’s true. He’s seized with the certainty that there’s nothing, nothing in this world that could break him and Haru in two. Haru always thinks he's meddlesome. Haru always thinks he's annoying and does too much. But Haru is Haru, and he always finds his way back to Makoto’s side, like a ship to port.

Makoto has nothing to be afraid of, whatever happens when he and Haru speak.

Looking up, he meets Rei’s concerned gaze for a second as he lets go of Nagisa. “I’ll be right back,” he says, still smiling.

He goes up the stairs and there’s Haru, leaning over the parapet, looking out at the water. The water he’s always loved, the water that’s brought him to this day, that he’s suddenly not sure of anymore. And yet, when things are bad, Haru always winds up turning to the water again to find his solace.

“I thought you’d be here,” he says, lightly, coming up to join him.

Haru doesn’t tell him to go away immediately. He takes it as a good sign.

 

**1.**

The words still hang in the air between them as Makoto’s hand drops back to his side. Haru’s frozen there, staring at his empty wrist in midair, like something’s missing.

_Well, say something._

_Haru. Oh, Haru,_ thinks Makoto. _I’ve said so much. You just haven’t been listening._

 _”Got it. We’ll go on ahead, then.”_ _I understand you. I’m giving you space._

_”I was just talking with Ama-chan-sensei…” And Haru, I need to share this with you. I need to talk to you about my future, because you’re important to me._

_”It’s just that -“ Haru, I don’t want to tell you what to do with your life. It’s the other way round. I’m trying to tell you about mine. I don’t want to do things without telling you._

_”I thought you’d be here.” I know you, Haru. I know you better than I know myself, sometimes. I know what brings you comfort. I know your quirks. I’ve memorised you._

_”Because we all love you.” Because I love you._

_Because we all care about you.” Because I care about you._

When the words finally come out of his mouth, it’s almost anticlimactic, to Makoto. He’s already said so much to Haru all week long. Now that he has Haru’s undivided attention, now that Haru is finally, at long last, asking him to speak, it’s easy, and his voice doesn’t shake.

“I’ve decided. I’m going to a university in Tokyo.”

Haru’s eyes widen. The shock on his face is so raw, like a wound ripped open.

Makoto almost wants to reach out to touch him, but he knows that if he does, Haru will push him away. Not because he doesn’t love Makoto, but because he _does_ , and Makoto telling him he’s leaving Iwatobi, leaving Haru’s side, is too much for him to take in all at once. _It’ll take time._

Makoto knows all this, and he holds Haru’s gaze steady. Those deep blue eyes stare straight into his soul, piercing and intense, like an arrow. Right on cue, the fireworks go off. If the mood between them wasn’t so serious, Makoto might have laughed. It’s so ridiculous, all this pouring out now, with this dramatic backdrop, the lights in the night sky, lanterns in the water beneath them, and not a soul in sight. Just the two of them, full of words now where it’s been so tortuously silent between them the whole week.

“I meant to tell you sooner, but I just couldn’t find a way to say it.” He stops, briefly, wondering what to say next. “I…”

“Do whatever you want!” shouts Haru, cutting him off as he turns and runs.

“Haru!”

Makoto reaches out to him a split second too late. He takes a half step forward, pauses, and stills. Haru’s out of sight now, probably running back down the stairs and in the other direction, away from Nagisa and Rei. He’ll find the most secluded spot possible on the beach, curl up into a tight, tight ball, sit with the water at his toes, and stare out onto the boundless sea as the storm rages inside. Haru doesn’t show his feelings, even to the water.

There’s nothing Makoto can do now. But it’s a calm feeling that settles over him, the knowledge that it’s all out there between them, that he’s said something, and Haru’s heard it. Like a dam breaking, the water can flow again. He can breathe now. _It’ll be okay._

He slowly makes his way back down to rejoin the others. He sees Nagisa’s blond head dashing towards the stairs anxiously even before he reaches the bottom step.

“Mako-chan!” Nagisa is out of breath. “We saw… we saw…”

“We saw Haruka-senpai run off that way!” cries Rei, almost as agitated as Nagisa is. “Should we go after him?”

Makoto turns to look where Rei is pointing. He sees the tinest of figures in the distance, fading into the night sky.

“No,” says Makoto. “It’s fine. Leave him.”

“What did you talk to him about? Did you convince him to go for it? With his swimming?” The questions spill out of Nagisa one after the other, nonstop, in an anxious, torrential babble.

Makoto shakes his head. “It was nothing like that. I just told him we want him to be happy. And he listened. He listened to what I had to say.”

Rei’s brows are furrowed. “So… it was okay? Haruka-senpai, he’ll be all right after all?”

“Yes,” says Makoto, simply. And he smiles.


End file.
